So, basically...

A quote from a current k-drama that I love: " I have no courage to die. But I am sick of cheering myself up." - Jung Haera, BLACK KNIGHT. Agreed. Totally. I will keep on living, these too shall pass, until it is finally time for me to leave. Well...

with suicidal thoughts that I've been having since forever, that seems unavoidable.  Thank God, I still believe in God. And this will keep me alive.

they're the faces of my father,  my mother,  myself.  and a guy that i should not have pushed away, a long, long time ago. he keeps showing up in my dreams, every time I have regrets over things.

need to keep moving, to forget. the pain.